the dynamics of expectation

My sister is many people. It's a measure of how fragile she is, I think, how her whole demeanor and expressions change dependent on who she is around. With my parents, she's reverted to child-mode: asking for things, testing limits, being demanding as both a test and measure of love. My mom gave me a whole laundry list of things she would or would not eat- "you have to get her cereal, this particular kind, she won't eat otherwise. and this kind of soap, and oh she needs coffee, and I don't know what you're going to feed her for dinner, but..." and she heaves a great sigh, and her voice gets snippy. "I know you think you can handle it, but she's a lot of work. You have no idea. You think it's all so easy, and it's not." My mom then goes on to complain how she doesn't have a minute to her self, morning till night, because she's spending all the time on julie. Her own choice, of course, but she won't see how she chooses to act influence how julie responds.

I of course, merely say "we are eating here, or here, what do you prefer?" There is no question of cereal for breakfast, she gets what I get- yogurt, granola, and berries, and a coffee to go. We ate in the car on the way up. On some level, I am still the younger sister, and so she indulges me. I know it's easier, but it didn't even occur to me to alter my daily routines. She's an adult, if she wants something else she can walk to the grocery store and get it.

She was yet a different person, of course, after her evening meeting, the influence of yet more people. She was a little manic, more flippant. I spent the evening collecting house and writing pr0n. I mean publications. Still, I think it was good for all of us. My parents got to sleep in, julie got a slumber party, and it turned out I did the right things. I think.

Time will tell.